August 2010
25 posts
Hot Dogs & Safety Belts
I can tell a lot about a person by the toppings they choose for their hog dogs. It isn’t much, but it’s enough. I’ll never hit on a relish or chopped onions, but straight up mustard and you know they’re a keeper. A little unpredictable. They probably own a motorcycle but still cry every time they watch My Girl. So, how did I end up with a ketchup only? I guess I...
July 2010
31 posts
Obviously
He was a magician. She was a rabbit. It was never going to work out.
Cloud Hat
Lynn wasn’t like other girls. She had a cloud. A small one that floated above her head. She wore it like a mood ring, but really she had no choice. She couldn’t shake it. When she was happy the cloud was the whitest fluffiest bit of air, but when she was angry, the cloud threw a fit. Her hair was a static-y mess with the bits of lightening every few minutes. She tried to stay in...
In Black
“Hey Esther,” Miranda yelled from the car window. She beeped her horn three times in a row. No one was home. That was fine by her. She didn’t really want to see Esther. It was just an excuse to drive her car. Anywhere. Everywhere. She didn’t care much for home.
Miranda hated her parents, her little brother’s snapping turtle and the pea green curtains in her...
He's Named After Keith Richards
“Keith!” Bill yelled, looking around. ”Keith! Where are you?” He looked under his right shoe. Not there. Under the left. Not there either.
“Where are you, little guy?”
Bill was known in his neighborhood for being eccentric. He often wore neon pink sweatpants when he went out jogging. Everyone walked by, waved hello and pretended like everything was...
Dogs
He would only eat hot dogs. Mustard, lettuce, tomatoes & cheddar cheese. A combination he made up.
Thirty-three thousand hot dogs later, his breath was salty. His tears stung his eyes. His stomach rattled. And his only friend was the local hot dog vendor. But he was happy.
And sometimes that’s all that matters.
Up in Smoke
There are fantasies that are never realistic. They are simply that: fantasies. They exist only in your head and for no one else. It’s when you can’t tell the difference between fantasy and reality that life gets dangerous.
It’s when day light feels like a dark alley. When you leave the house wearing a wig, sunglasses and a trench coat, because you don’t know...
Damaged Goods
She moved like a butterfly, arms extended like wings, watching her fly was exhilarating. I envisioned her in front of my lens, posing, walking the catwalks and slowly rising through the ranks to stardom. It’s too bad she’s damaged goods. No one likes broken hip bones and cracked skulls in their magazines.
Messed
Her lipstick was smeared from the corner of her mouth all the way to her left earlobe. It wasn’t attractive. I wasn’t going to save her this time, so I watched her stumble down the stairs, heels falling off, hair coming undone and panties missing. She was a tragedy.
A beautiful tragedy.
I wanted to hold her in my arms and comfort her like I had in past, but I knew that it would...
Kicked
She walked down the stairs, losing her balance midway, feeling helpless, I ran to catch her, but instead, I got kicked. Hard. And I’ve never felt better.
She blushed, apologized and walked away embarrassed. I stood saying nothing, watching her walk away, thinking about the bruise swelling up on the side of my head.
I wanted to run after her, but life isn’t a movie.
It’s...
One Kiss
Josie always wore red heels. She wore them to be noticed even if she wasn’t feeling particularly nice that day. It forced her to be friendly, nod her head at strangers and laugh at stupid pick-up lines.
Harley was in love with Josie. This wasn’t a secret. Josie even knew it. Harley and Josie were best friends and neighbors.
“You can’t be in love with your best...
Surprise, Surprise
The air was foul and filled with flies. I didn’t want to be here in a dark alley, but I promised Vince that I’d meet him.
“You there?” Vince asked, his keys rattling in his pocket.
“I’m here. Unfortunately.”
“Do you have it?”
“I have it.”
I handed over the remote. Its buttons glowing in the dark.
“Finally, it’s...
Stanley's
Starla sits across the bar from me. I don’t know her name yet, but I want to know it. I am mustering up the courage to go talk to her, when she comes to me, making my life a lot easier.
She leans in real close to me, drink in hand, and asks, “Have you ever been to Stanley’s?”
I choke. ”Excuse me?”
“That place across the street. Stanley’s...
Gee, Thanks!
Ben walked forward, eyes averted and hands in his pockets, trying to look normal. He walked right up to Beth Gibson, stared her in the eyes and turned right. He continued walking right into the men’s room and let out a sigh. He washed his hands with cold water.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
“I can do this,” he said, looking into the mirror, adjusting his tie. ”No big...
Bank Notes
Darlene never had enough money.
She never bought any more than she needed, but it always seemed to be disappearing. She’d reach into her bag and where her cash had been would be an empty hole. She thought it was just coincidence, but whenever she would get to the checkout counter and reach into her bag, her money would be gone. She would be left staring right down at the checkered...
What?
His breath smelled like beer and as Leeanne leaned in to kiss him, she thought, “It’s only nine in the morning.” Instead of turning away, she went for it and we all know what kissing a custodian at nine in the morning leads to, yes?
It leads to empty classrooms, buckets spilling over and a life of mediocrity.
Leeanne liked it that way.
Good
She smelled like gasoline. Her hair was wet, clothes dripping and her eyes glistened.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. ”What did you do?”
“It was an accident.”
It was always an accident.
“Do you need help?”
“No, I can handle it.”
She walked away, turned around to face me, opened her mouth to say something but instead turned around...
Paw Prints in the Flour
Dear X,
It just wasn’t meant to be. No us. No me. Just you. I’m sorry that I left in the middle of the night. I wanted to hold you through your tears, but I knew it couldn’t be and I didn’t want to suffer anymore. Not my suffering. Yours. Through and through, I knew I made you cry. I knew my strokes were not enough and I understand and I’m leaving you a...
Logical Explanations
He pulled the covers up to his chin, turned to his wife and said, “I can’t think straight.”
She mumbled, half asleep, “Well, why don’t you think crooked?”
Z
Shawn covers his nose as he walks down the street. The smell overwhelms him. He looks right. He looks left. It’s following him. The smell dissipates as he walks into the corner drugstore to buy cigarettes. The cashier eyes him and sneers as he hands him back change. Shawn shrugs.
“You smell it too?”
The man nods.
“It’s not me, ya know.”
The man nods...
Left Turns
The rain fell hard, but umbrella in hand, Sandy trudged on. The wind tugged and tried to rip it from her hands, but she held on tightly. She wasn’t sure how long she’d been walking and the wall of rain obscured her vision, but she knew she would eventually find her way.
She heard voices in front of her and knew that she must be close. If only she could see past the umbrella, past...
Same as Always
The grass was still covered in dew as she kicked off her shoes and felt the crunch under her feet. The lawn, freshly mowed, stuck in between her toes and it tickled. It had been years since she dared go outside.
As a witness, Drew stared out the window, watching the people walk by, reading the newspaper and ignoring each other. The world was full of pain and one Monday she didn’t show up...
Spaced
Jonathon hated everything. It wasn’t an exaggeration. He was only four years old, but he was on pace to be the world’s grumpiest human being. Nothing made Jonathon happy. Not balloons. Not Sea World. Not naps. Not even cake.
His parents, exhausted, put their hands up in the air. They were out of ideas. They couldn’t stand the crying or fussing any longer. Of course,...
Fast Fast Slow
I don’t like to drive. I like to be driven. I realized that it takes two kinds in life. There’s always one that does and one that doesn’t.
But I’m no backseat. I’m shotgun all the way. I hate to say it, but I’m a sidekick. I’ll never be a hero and that’s okay.
It takes all kinds. There are winners and losers and then there’s me....
What is it?
“Do you hear that?”
“Are you imagining things again?”
“No. Don’t you hear it?”
“What?”
“That!”
“That buzzing?”
“Not that. That! Wait. It stopped.”
“Oh that! Sorry.”
Buzz
The buzz started fifteen years ago.
Kay was only three when her ears filled with the bzzz.
“Dad, there are bees in my head.”
“Don’t be silly, Kay.”
But Kay complained about the bzzz nonstop. So her parents took her to the doctor and the doctor told them exactly what they thought, no bees! They checked her ears three different times. They were perfect.
But...
Mint
When you look down at me, I’m not scared, but I’m not sure you see me waving hello every morning. I yell. I scream. But you never acknowledge me. I ignore your silence. I leave you notes.
Hi, Ted! My name is Joanne and I want to be friends. Can you see me?
You never answer.
I see you reading. I see you scratching your head. I see you put it aside but still nothing. Day...
Honey Pot
Dusty Agave didn’t like guns. Her brother had gone to prison to rot there for his crimes and for this she swore she would never bother with the stuff. The criminal life was simply not for her. Her family had been pecked off one by one — her father at age 8, her mother at 17 and her brother was still in prison. She had no one but herself. All of this before she had even graduated...
Damn It
“She’s out there,” Mike thought, ear to the door. ”What do I do?”
He walked back to his chair, sat down and put his elbows on the table. He twiddled his thumbs. He put his head in his hands and covered his face.
“Oh god, what do I do?” he said to his empty office. The office didn’t reply.
He opened drawers. He slammed drawers. He opened...
Listen
“I can’t…”
He put his finger to my mouth quieting me. ”Shh”
“But…”
He stared into my eyes.
“I…”
“Don’t speak,” he said, interrupting.
“Why?”
Stern look.
“OH MY GOD!”
Then everyone was quiet.
Mad World
“Billy, you can’t change the world,” Anne said, turning away from the TV.
“I don’t want to change it. I want to reinvent it.”
“How are you going to do that?” she said, tilting her head to one side.
“Well, first, I have to destroy it.”
